Seriously, STOP changing.

So the infamous Montana relationship has come to an end. I'm not sure what happened, exactly. But what I am sure of is that I've decided I'm tired of change. It's such a weird time of my life, almost a year ago I lost two special animals aka "friends" (Poon and Baby Chicken),  a year prior to that I lost my furry friend, Ribsy. Now I'm staring at my chocolate lab, Dos, and he's about ready to go...cancer. In the middle of it all, I've changed jobs and the man that I was ready "be with" is no longer.  I guess God doesn't give you more than you can handle...or does he?

Love my new company but the dog situation coupled with the loss of boyfriend situation is a little more than I can take right now.  When do the stars align?  When are all aspects of our lives in "awesome"mode?  Is it when you don't want it? Is it when you least expect it? Ok, well let me put this out there...I really expect it and like, RIGHT NOW.  What do you dive into in order to not think about the sadness you feel?  Wine, yep, I've done that. I do have to go to work so "wine" is temporary.  I feel like I could run a marathon right now but on the other hand I can't move off this seat.

I think I've been a pretty positive player, always saying it will all work out for the best. It's hasn't. I want the best, it's my turn.

Seriously.

Time on my hands ...

So I'm hanging out with myself tonight,  I've done this a lot but tonight I feel bored. If someone asked me to do something I wouldn't go...WTF???  I wish everyone I knew and loved would just come hang out with me every night. Maybe not every night, but maybe we could have a calendar...you know, a schedule. But it wouldn't be a set in stone schedule...just if we both feel like it schedule. I love hanging out with friends, but making the effort seems, well, like effort. Does that make me a bad friend or does it make me a lazy friend? I vote for Lazy Friend. A lazy Friend is still a GOOD friend, just lazy. The thing is, once I get out I always have a great time bc I have awesome friends. Am I the only one that thinks like this? What is it about the excitement of having a plan but then not wanting to go and then wishing you had... I think this is somehow the same kind of cruel joke as women having periods, babies, menopause, stretch marks and men having...um, well nothing!!! The only thing we had on men was that they couldn't get an erection...but thanks Viagra!!!  I'm not  even sure if that last thing made sense to anyone but me. It totally made sense when I was talking to myself about it...not out loud of course. 

HA, I just started thinking...I started a new job this past week (which, btw, I love) and have some FB friends from my new job. If they read this I'm not sure they'll get it bc they don't know me very well....SO.... attention new FB friends....I write Blogs after a couple glasses of wine...so please don't take this too seriously.  And obviously I don't drink  a lot because there aren't many entries.  (Old FB friends, that will be our little secret.)  ;)

This is at the bottom of the list of favorite blogs so I will add a little something special...

My buddy!

When Things Change In our Lives

I looked back on when I wrote anything and I thought wow....I wrote when I was sad and I wrote when I was drunk. LOL, yep that's right I was 2-3 glasses of wine in on that last one.

So I have recently quit my job and it was the most emotional decision I've ever made. I literally was holding Alaina's hand (that's my boss) and sobbing like a baby. Ha, she held my clammy hand and was listening and confused and shocked and well, sad... I think....and maybe a little grossed out about my sweaty palm.  See at Garman we are family, we have a culture that most don't understand and even more don't care about or believe in.  Most times people will move on and when they do it sucks when you have a culture like we do.  I believe that paths cross for a reason, we learn lessons from those that walk our path with us (even if it's for a short time) and we're always better for having gone through change.  That doesn't mean that I like change but I understand it's necessary.

I guess I'm writing because I'm sad tonight... Yep, I'm sad.  I'm also excited that there is something new around the corner. But mostly right now, I'm trying to appreciate the other 16 people that I worked with at Garman Homes and all they have taught me...

Nancy ... my cheerleader, my Fairfield buddy and my friend.
Val...the one that surprises me every time I see her with some off the wall comment, completely not expected.
Lydie...always sweet, always smiling...and I'm always wishing you the best.
Kristi... funny, loud (like me) and always wanting the best!!
Eric...ouch!! ouch!!! I mean,  I love when you squeeze our necks and try to break them.
Jim...ok, see ya' bye...and thanks! ;)
Yosra...you're full of talent and charm....good combination.
Don...seriously, is there anyone that can give my "stuff" a voice and make it hilarious...nope.
Gerry... oh you softy, you're butt cheek dance can't be duplicated...be proud.
Dink...dude chill out, you're way too worked up.
Kevin... coupons, coupons, coupons, and the best CM I've ever worked with. Thank you.
Dan...smiling, helpful, trustworthy, and always my calming influence.
Laurel...oh princess, rocky start...sweet finish! Your strength is inspiring.
Mags... oh Mags, laughter and smiles, your friendship is everlasting to all. Please don't put me at the end of the line, or even second to the end. :)
Katie...ahhh deep breath,  I get you...you have an amazing future ahead of you... I know it.
Allison...friend to the end...bumps and bruises and still solid...your fire is what drives you and it is amazing.
Alaina...oh girl, don't lose the heart that brought you this far...you're like no other. Lots of love to you always!!!

A small chapter of my life has ended, but it's in writing so not to be forgotten. Love you all!

Change. It's happening.